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Morning Martini
5/23/2025: Pitch the Penny!

5/23/2025: Pitch the Penny!

PLUS: Ship Mishap; Slap On The Wrist; and Whiskey Launch

May 23, 2025
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Morning Martini
Morning Martini
5/23/2025: Pitch the Penny!
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Today is Friday, May 23, 2025.

It is the 143rd day of the year.

222 days remain.

a penny sitting on the ground next to a pair of scissors
Photo by Gio Bartlett on Unsplash

PROGRAMMING NOTE

There will be no newsletter on Monday, May 26, in observation of Memorial Day.

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WHAT’S ON TAP

NOTABLE & NOTEWORTHY: Harvard handles an unprecedented blow to its enrollment practices.

KID CUDI testifies and TAYLOR SWIFT’s subpoena gets dropped. More in SHOWBIZ.

Another “DWTS” contestant gets announced. Details in CASTING CALL.

PRINCESS KATE launches a ship she’s sponsored for four years. Details in ROYALS.

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The Treasury Department announced on Thursday that it will stop circulating new one-cent coins next year.

There’s no set end date in mind. The US Mint will work through its stock of blank templates until they run out.

True to government form, it costs about 4 cents to produce a penny. The US Mint estimates ending production will save $56 MILLION every year in material costs alone, and even more once production facilities are retired.

LOOKING AHEAD: Once pennies run out of circulation, businesses might still allow one-cent price increments for card transactions and round up or down for cash. [via WSJ]

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The North Korean military failed to launch a 5,000-ton destroyer on Wednesday. With KIM JONG JUNIOR on hand to witness the destroyer Chongjin hit the water, the ship fell off the slipway on its way into the ocean while its bow remained stuck on the ramp, tearing holes in the ship’s hull. It then fell onto its side, where it apparently remains in the water.

While the North Korean government did not release photos of the mishap, South Korean intelligence officials have leaked to media that they were watching the fiasco on satellite images.

Publicly, Junior isn’t happy about it. In a statement issued on state media, the Dear Leader calls the situation “a serious accident and criminal act caused by absolute carelessness, irresponsibility and unscientific empiricism.” He’ll convene the Workers’ Party next month to get to the bottom of it. [via NYT]

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SHMOLLEGE: In a groundbreaking move on Thursday, the Department of Homeland Security withdrew Harvard’s authorization to enroll any foreign students at all. DHS oversees the Student and Exchange Visitor Program across the country, which gives the department authority to manage whether foreign students can enroll in American schools. This means foreign students already enrolled will also have to transfer.

In a statement, DHS asserts that Harvard has failed to provide records of criminal activity connected to foreign students who have contributed to an unsafe campus environment, particularly for Jewish students.

IT GETS WORSE: The statement also alleges: “Harvard’s leadership further facilitated, and engaged in coordinated activity with the [Chinese Communist Party], including hosting and training members of a CCP paramilitary group complicit in the Uyghur genocide.” Yikes. [via DHS]

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WALMART will layoff 1,500 corporate employees in the coming weeks, simplifying internal departments covering e-commerce and advertising.

While the official memo says the job cuts “allows us to accelerate how we deliver and adapt to the changing environment around us,” it doesn’t mention the likely culprit behind the reduced headcount: artificial intelligence.

Even off-the-shelf A.I. platforms can now simplify data entry and analysis jobs that just a year ago would require teams of humans. [via Reuters]

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WHAT’S YOUR SIGN?: A nationwide survey found that about 3 in 10 Americans use astrology, tarot cards, or fortune tellers at least once a year.

Broken down, about 2 in 10 say they entertain psychic services “just for fun,” while another 1 in 10 say they “believe” in what is conveyed to them.

The world of tarot, charms, and psychics is big doings, with more than $2.3 BILLION made in revenue last year, according to IBIS World. [via PewResearch, IBISWorld]

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REMINDER: There will be no newsletter on Monday, May 26, in observation of Memorial Day.

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