Discover more from Morning Martini
12/16/2022: One Long Leek
PLUS: Trump’s Weird Day; Cavill Out: and SKIMS Success
Today is Friday, December 16, 2022.
It is the 350th day of the year.
15 days remain.
#MajorAnnouncement landed in Twitter’s Top 10 Trends on Thursday after Donald Trump promised major news. Head to Swamp to see what it was.
#HarryandMeganNetflix was trending Thursday after Part 2 of the Sussexes’ docuseries dropped. More in Royals.
Former QB Drew Brees has a new job! Head to Sports to check it out.
Going bankrupt is expensive: The fixer brought in to oversee the restructuring of crypto firm FTX is earning $1,300 an hour plus expenses, according to court filings. Assuming a typical 40 hour workweek, that works out to $2.6 million a year.
His three top lieutenants cost $975 an hour each.
Whatever hodgepodge of bank funds are left in FTX accounts will foot the bill. And despite the millions in labor costs, it’s a nominal amount to find billions in mismanaged, misallocated, and misspent funds.
Archaeologists in Turkey believe they’ve discovered the oldest “narrative scene” – an artistic depiction of an event, that may or may not be based on something that actually happened.
WORTH NOTING: This isn’t a novel concept for modern humans – we over document everything we do. But before phones, and of course before paper, or canvas, or parchment, or even clay tablets, this was a novel concept.
The scene found is believed to be about 11,000 years old. It’s a two-panel carving in limestone. In one panel, a man is depicted staving off what looks like a bull. In the second, things get a little more wild: a man is surrounded by animals that look like leopards – and he’s holding his erection.
One of the researchers says, “This was a picture of the stories that formed the ideology of the people of that period.” Do with that what you will.
ALSO WORTH NOTING: What makes this scene unique is the two panels, suggesting some kind of continuity from one to the next, separating it from ancient cave paintings that just capture one event at a time.
STILL UNSURE: Researchers believe the carvings depict an historical or mythical figure, and it was carved at a communal gathering location.
Local news in Uganda reports that a lucky 2-year-old boy survived being swallowed by a hippo – which coughed the tyke back up after onlookers started pelting the animal with rocks.
Hippos are reportedly responsible for at least 500 deaths a year in Africa. Its jaws include massive tusks and sharp teeth to make quick work of prey.
The world’s longest leek has been grown in Stoke-on-Trent, England.
It measures over 4-feet-8-inches – nearly five times longer than the kind you’ll find at the grocery store. But this was no freak incident – the grower says he’s wanted to hold a world record since he was a kid, and used a special tube to encourage it to grow to the length it did.
This leek breaks the previous record, set just last year, of 4 feet, 5.5 inches.
A new study in the Journal of Clinical Endocrinology & Metabolism shows that people with Type 2 Diabetes who follow intermittent fasting diets can completely reverse the disease.
The study followed 36 people who were put on a 3-month intermittent dieting program, and showed 90% of the participants reduced their diabetes medication upon completion. Nearly half were able to stop their diabetes medication completely for at least a year.
BY THE NUMBERS
📈 The Dow dropped 764 points (2.25%) to close at 33,202 on Thursday. The S&P lost 99 points (2.49%) to close at 3,895 while the Nasdaq dropped 360 points (3.23%) to close at 10,810.
🛢 West Texas Intermediate slid to $76 a barrel; Brent Crude to $82.
⛽ The national average price of a gallon of gas was $3.19 on Thursday.
₿ Bitcoin lost more than $407 Thursday, trading around $17,399.
🛩 There were 4,918 flights delayed within, into, or out of the United States on Thursday and 273 such cancellations.
New to Amazon Prime:
About Fate (Rotten Tomatoes Score: 63%)
The Night Before (No Score)
Unexpectedly Expecting (No Score)
New to Hulu:
Collide (No Score)
I Love My Dad (Score: 73%)
New to Netflix:
Private Lesson (No Score)
Insiders tell CNN that First Lady JILL BIDEN is now on board for a re-election campaign. It appears Democrats’ midterm over performance encouraged her to get behind another run at the White House.
The Biden Family Crime Syndicate is expected to assemble over the Christmas holiday and make a final decision then.
Former President DONALD TRUMP had a weird day yesterday.
His first bit of news was releasing a set of NFT “trading cards” featuring himself in various costumes and poses. It’s as bizarre as it sounds.
WORTH REMEMBERING: An NFT is a “non-fungible token” that was all the rage at the peak of the artificially inflated economy last year. “Owning” one of these NFTs is only as valuable as people who say they’re valuable, and there just aren’t a lot of people who say they’re valuable in the first place. You can get your own for $99. Or you could just screenshot one already out there and you’d have, essentially, the same thing.
AND THEN: Trump released a more formal, sane video outlining the executive order he would sign if he’s reelected in 2024 pertaining to free speech policy. In an attempt to prevent the collusion between the government and social media platforms that has happened in the past, Trump’s proposed order would ban any government agency or officials from working with private entities in any way that curbs free speech. This is the first of similar videos he’s expected to drop in the coming days.
No winner for Tuesday night’s Mega Millions drawing. Tonight’s drawing will be for a $429 million jackpot or a $233.6 million cash payout.
No winner for Wednesday night’s Powerball drawing. Saturday night’s drawing will be for a $149 million jackpot or a $80.4 million cash payout.
These albums drops today:
Bre Kennedy, “Clarity” EP
Cheap Trick, “Live at the Whisky 1977”
Chief Keef, “Almighty So 2”
Circa Survive, “Two Dreams”
Frank Zappa, “Waka/Wazoo”
Jacquees, “Sincerely For You
Kurt Uenala, “Manuscript” EP
Nakhane, “Leading Lines” EP
KOBE BRYANT’s daughter, NATALIA BRYANT, has been granted a restraining order against her alleged stalker 32-year-old Dwayne Kemp.
A judge granted the three-year order of protection this week, ordering Kemp to stay at least 200 yards away from Natalia, her home, her job, her car, school and sorority house at USC.
He also has been banned from possessing and purchasing firearms and was ordered to surrender any that he currently owns.
The jersey LEBRON JAMES wore during Game 7 of the 2013 NBA Finals is hitting the auction block.
Sotheby’s Auctions says it is the most valuable LeBron James jersey to ever be offered at auction and they are expecting to get a whopping $3 million for it.
The jersey is from James’ time with the Miami Heat.
Bidding starts January 27.
Despite an internal review into their affair, “GMA” co-anchors AMY ROBACH and TJ HOLMES are going strong.
An insider told E! News that the couple are “still very much together,” while also keeping their distance as the investigation plays out.
The man who tackled comedian DAVE CHAPPELLE in May has been sentenced for his actions.
After pleading no contest, Isaiah Lee, 24, was sentenced this week to 270 days in prison for his assault on Chappelle, as well as carrying a replica gun and a knife in a restricted area. He avoided felony charges because he did not show the weapons during the attack, according to The Post.
As for why he attacked the comedian, Lee said that he was “triggered” by Chappelle’s controversial material about the LGBTQ+ community.
“Survivor 43” winner MIKE GABLER donated his $1 million in prize money to veterans.
The 52-year-old told host JEFF PROBST that he planned to give away his winnings in honor of his father, who was a Green Beret, to veterans who are recovering from psychiatric problems, PTSD and to help “curb the suicide epidemic.”
“Chrisley Knows Best” stars TODD and JULIE CHRISLEY will report to prison in January.
Todd, who was sentenced to 12 years, will turn himself into the Federal Prison Camp Pensacola on January 17. Julie, who got seven years, will serve her time at the Federal Correctional Institution Marianna, according to People.
As previously reported, the couple were found guilty of tax evasion and bank fraud in June.
TREVOR NOAH will host the 65th Annual Grammy Awards for the third consecutive year.
Billboard announced Thursday that the 38-year-old will return to emcee the show, which is set for February 5 at the Crypto.com Arena.
Noah joins LL COOL J as the only other person to ever host the Grammys at least three consecutive times in the last 30 years.
Just months after announcing plans to return to his role as Superman, HENRY CAVILL revealed he is out.
The actor shared the news with his 23 million Instagram followers this week, explaining that he got the boot after meeting with newly hired DC Studios co-chairmen JAMES GUNN and PETER SAFRAN, who will co-produce the next installment of the “Man of Steel.”
Cavill played the superhero in 2013’s “Man of Steel,” 2016’s “Batman v. Superman” and 2017’s “Justice League.”
MEANWHILE: Gunn took to Twitter, promising that he and Safran will soon announce “a new and exciting Superman project,” while also confirming Cavill’s exit.
The new ABC reality show, “The Parent Test,” allows others to critique the way people choose to parent their children.
Here’s how it works: Co-hosts ALI WENTWORTH and parenting expert Dr. ADOPLH BROWN, sit in a room with all the moms and dads as each set of parents take turns letting the group watch how their children behaved in various situations.
The group then votes on which parenting styles should advance, until one emerges victorious; winning the honor of being deemed “the best way to raise a child.”
THE DAILY KARDASHOPUS
KIM KARDASHIAN may have had a rocky year personally, but fiscally, she is thriving.
Bloomberg reported this week that her company, SKIMS, is forecasted to bring in over $400 million this year.
The publication noted that if Kim were to take the company public, it could be the largest IPO involving a celebrity. But insiders say before that would ever happen, Kim and her business partners are planning to work on international growth -- expanding into Australia, China, the Middle East and the UK.
WE’LL NEVER BE ROYALS
Part 2 of PRINCE HARRY and MEGHAN MARKLE’s Netflix docuseries dropped Thursday and so did the bombshells.
DEATH THREATS: Meg kicked off round two talking about the many death threats she received online, including one that read: “Meghan needs to die. Someone needs to kill her. Maybe it should be me.” In response, she said she couldn’t sleep and was constantly worried about the safety of their son, ARCHIE.
BAD BLOOD: Harry discussed a tense meeting he had with his dad, KING CHARLES, brother PRINCE WILLIAM and grandmother QUEEN ELIZABETH about wanting to take some steps back from royal life. He claims there was a huge blowup between him and Will, who (according to Harry) “screamed” at him.
MEDIA TO BLAME: Harry also blamed Meg’s miscarriage on the media, specifically calling out the Daily Mail. He told the camera that while they cannot definitively say the publication caused it, the stress and sleepless nights and timing of the pregnancy all factored into it.
GODFATHER PERRY: One random tidbit revealed in the series is that TYLER PERRY is LILIBET’s Godfather. One may assume that such a coveted role went to Perry because he has history with the couple -- he did, afterall, let them move into one of his homes -- but that is not the case. When Harry, Meg and Archie moved into Perry’s California home in 2020, they didn’t know each other. In fact, they had never even met, he was simply just helping them out. Since then they have formed a friendship, but surely someone else was better suited?
Former New Orleans Saints QB DREW BREES has joined the coaching staff at Purdue as an interim assistant coach.
The school announced Thursday that Brees will work on the field with players and participate in recruiting, as the team prepares for the upcoming Citrus Bowl.
LIST OF THE WEEK
Here is how much the things listed in “The 12 Days of Christmas” song cost in 2022:
A Partridge in a Pear Tree - $280.18
Two Turtle Doves - $600
Three French Hens - $318.75
Four Calling Birds - $599.96
Five Gold Rings - $1,245
Six Geese-A-Laying - $720
Seven Swans-A-Swimming - $13,124.93
Eight Maids-A-Milking - $58
Nine Ladies Dancing - $8,308.12
Ten Lords-A-Leaping - $13,980
Eleven Pipers Piping - $3,201.40
Twelve Drummers Drumming - $3,266.93
In total, that is more than $45,500.
*Info courtesy of PNC Bank
DAY OF THE YEAR
National Ugly Christmas Sweater Day
Stupid Toy Day
National Underdog Day
Day of Reconciliation
National Chocolate Covered Anything Day
ON THIS DATE
1773 – Colonial rebels dressed up like Indians to dump 342 chests of tea from British ships into the Boston Harbor.
The Boston Tea Party was in protest of the Tea Act, which gave the East India Company a monopoly on the tea market in the colonies.
In retaliation, the Parliament passed the Intolerable Acts, which essentially shut down commerce in and out of Boston harbor, and enforced military rule.
In response, the colonies convened the first Continental Congress to build a united resistance.
1811 – The largest earthquake on record in the United States rocks New Madrid, Missouri.
There weren't many people in the area, so the 8.6 magnitude quake caused no reported deaths.
Aftershocks were felt all the way to the East Coast, strong enough to reportedly ring church bells.
1944 – Adolf Hitler orders three German armies into the heart of Ally-occupied territory, to kick off what was later called the Battle of the Bulge.
The surge of troops took the Allies by surprise, plunging deep into Allied territory. Given the cloudy and foggy weather, Americans were unable to launch an air campaign to defend themselves.
The Allies maintained a fierce resistance on the ground, however. By January 21, the Germans would be pushed all the way back to the original battle lines.
1973 – OJ Simpson becomes the first NFL player to rush for more than 2,000 yards in a single season.
The Buffalo Bills running back racked up a total of 2,003 years that season. He would lead the league in rushing 4 times during the 1970s.
1977 – "Saturday Night Fever" premieres.
It helped launch a disco craze across the country, and propelled John Travolta to overnight superstardom. He earned a best-actor Oscar nomination for his role as Tony Manero.
2010 – Larry King signs off his CNN talk show for the last time.
King had hosted “Larry King Live” for 25 years, beginning in June 1985.
By his own count, he conducted 50,000 interviews in his 50 years of broadcasting.
2019 - Drew Brees breaks Peyton Manning’s NFL record of 539 career touchdown passes as his New Orleans Saints beat the Indianapolis Colts 34-7.
During that game, Brees threw 29/30 for 307 yards & 4 TDs for a 96.7% pass completion.
2020 - A winter storm drops a record 41 inches of snow in Binghamton, New York.
The storm resulted in seven deaths in the Northeast.
James Reynolds - daughter of Ryan Reynolds & Blake Lively - 8
Zara Larsson - pop singer - 25
Anna Popplewell - actress, “Reign” - 34
Theo James - actor, “Divergent” - 38
Krysten Ritter - actress, “Veronica Mars” & “Jessica Jones” - 41
Michale McCary - R&B singer, Boyz II Men - 45
Paul Scherrer - actor, “Children of Corn II” - 54
Benjamin Bratt - actor, “Law & Order” - 59
James Mangold - director - 59
William “The Refrigerator” Perry - football player - 60
Benny Andersson - musician, ABBA - 76
Born On This Date
Arthur C. Clarke - author, “2001: A Space Odyssey” - 1917 (d. 2008)
Jane Austen - novelist, “Pride and Prejudice” - 1775 (d. 1817)
Ludwig van Beethoven - composer - 1770 (d. 1827)
Catherine Of Aragon - first bride of King Henry VIII - 1485 (d. 1536)
Thanks for reading Morning Martini! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support our work.